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Forgive and Grow

Forgiving, I feel, is easy. Forgetting the experience that comes prior to the forgiveness, however, always remains with us. Choosing to forgive means choosing to let go of the bad or negative emotions that one experiences so that we can live in peace and harmony.

Five years ago I went through a painful divorce. Circumstances were such that my own family had to choose a side: my ex-husband or me. My older brother, a great believer of our faith, was very angry at my decision to divorce. Despite his response I felt my decision was valid. After two years of arguing over the phone and hurtful words in emails my brother and I ended our friendship in a cold silence.

Out of the blue he visited same city that I was living in to see our mother. I contemplated for nights about how to react to his visit. I sought advice from many friends'all of whom said I should wait for his apology before trying to repair our friendship. Since I had done no wrong, it was he that needed to come to me.

A very close friend advised me otherwise. He said 'Choose the moral, high ground. Choose to be the bigger person here; forgive and forget. Let go,' he said 'and move on.' Though is words gave me courage, I still felt very angry and betrayed. My dear friend gave me a gentle shove and even stayed on the phone (cell) while I went over to greet my brother and family. When I did, I felt so relieved. I felt peace at last!

Today I am so grateful to my friend for encouraging me. If I hadn't taken his advice, I wouldn't enjoy the loving relationship that I do now with all of my family. Still, it would be a lie if I said that I didn't think about the past sometimes. The difference though is that when I do, I do not feel angry or have any negative emotions. I am at peace and have a greater understanding and acceptance of the whole experience. In short I feel I have grown since then.

Story was submitted anonymously